20130219 Things I have learned from "School of Rock"

Things I have learned from "School of Rock"

• Substitute teachers are real teachers.
• Always check the ID of substitute teachers.
• If the police suspect you of impersonating a teacher and endangering children, all you have to do is run home and go to bed and they will not catch you.
• You need a ticket to get into a concert even if your kids are performing.
• It may be handy to know how to spell your friend's name.
• The children have had their lunch.
• Those that can't do, teach. And those that can't teach, teach gym.
• I believe the children are our future.
• Only try a stage dive when there are more that 5 people in the crowd.
• Kids think that green hair is rock 'n roll.
• Drum solos are gut bustin'
• Guitar solos are face meltin"
• In a US presidential election, people would vote for a primary school kid.
• Pink Floyd is homework.
• Making guitar sounds with your mouth is a good way to tell others what the music should sound like.
• If you can play a cello, you can play a bass.
• The "masters of the universe" stance can make you play better, a lot better.
• You are not hard core unless you live hardcore.
• You can sound-proof a room by stuffing towels under the windows.
• A recording on an Apple Mac is a good substitute for a substitute teacher.
• You're the man.
• When faced with an angry guitarist, the whole situation can be changed by saying "call security".
• I come from the land of ice and snow.
• Eyebrows can move independently of each other.
• If you tell someone to stand up for themselves, they might standup to you.
• Be prepared on parent-teacher night.
• If a school sends you a cheque, don't ask questions, its just your flatmate taking over your life.
• No one gets in without a ticket.
• The original member of a band is not the band.
• Every Fender Stratocaster has been played by Hendrix.
• A school uniform for a 20 stone man can easily fit into a lunch-size paper bag.
• Credits go up the screen.
• Alcoholics have a disease.
• Kids like to burn things.

References:

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0332379/

20130209 Chinese New Year BBQ.

20130209 Chinese New Year BBQ.

At a Chinese New Year barbecue a few friends were talking about their career plans. They are all teachers at a ‘prestigious international school’ and have impressive credentials in regards to the places they have worked and their long and continuing education. The fact that this is known is part of the social customs of Americans. While most other civilised societies consider the amount of money earned in a year to be a matter only discussed with an accountant, a solicitor while making a will and maybe your closest friend, the Americans seem to ask this question as way of quickly establishing a pecking order among colleagues.

One particularly bright chap regaled the assembled merry-makers with tales of working for and with such great minds as Jacob Goldman and for companies that have brought amazing and innovative products and inventions such as ‘the wheel’, double-sided sticky tape and the photocopy machine. In an effort to counter his like-minded science teacher and best friend, another teacher told his story of his involvement with the creation of the Internet while studying at Berkley and the life-saving research into the American obsession with ridding the world of the scourge of the remote probability of eating an egg contaminated with salmonella.

Sitting around a fire, just like our early ancestors, holding a piece of dead animal on a stick in the glowing embers it became apparent that as a civilisation, in terms of social customs, we have not progressed that far.

After all was said about their education, their research into lasers, radiation and optical physics, the brightest teacher of them all, the one who had worked for xerox and who currently held 4 masters degrees in physics and education, considered his primitive meal slowly roasting on the end of a stick by the heat of a open fire and asked a simple question: “How can you tell when chicken is cooked?”
References:
Note:
The term “prestigious international school” appeared on the Wikipedia entry with the conspicuous footnote of “citation needed” and had since been changed.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hong_Kong_International_School
http://www.nytimes.com/2011/12/22/business/jacob-e-goldman-founder-of-xerox-lab-dies-at-90.html?_r=0
http://solutions.3m.com/wps/portal/3M/en_US/3M-Defense-US/Defense/Products/Air/~/3M-Double-Coated-Urethane-Foam-Tape-4026-Natural-1-in-x-1-in-1-16-in-1000-Squares-per-pack-1-per-case?N=4294649436+5420242&Nr=AND(hrcy_id%3AGSC2NWK1YZgs_RPS963T64K_N2RL3FHWVK_GPD0K8BC31gv)&rt=d

Bridge TEFL Module 6.

20121207 Teaching English as a Foreign Language.

Bridge TEFL. Module 6.

Hello good people and fellow teachers of a language other than English.
There are many aspects to language: humour, seriousness, soliloquy, sarcasm, just to name a few. A comedian once quipped that English is impossible to learn, it must be memorised.
So once again, I pretend to be sincere while being disingenuous to the good people at Bridge TEFL for their wonderful charade of insincerity.

As the good people at Bridge TEFL said in the final lessons: Please compare your answer to this example and provide your own assessment.

=================================

o   Lexis

o   Phonics

o   Function

Date                      Level – Primary 1 (age 6 – 8)       Duration – 1 hour.

What is the Weather Like Today?

This lesson is typical for level one to three (ages 6 to 8) and introduces concepts about the weather, days of the week and temperature.  It can be used as a lead-in for calendar, counting, use of numbers, what clothes to wear.  Grammar subjects such as present and future can be explored.

Lesson type and subject:

·         Vocabulary and Grammar.

Materials:

Recording of the weather report for the week. MP3 or CD.  Suitable means to play recording.

Worksheets with days of the week.

PowerPoint or flash cards with new vocabulary words and meanings.

Lesson Objectives:

Teaching the subjective descriptions of weather: sunny, raining, cloudy and fine.

Teaching the quantative measurement of temperature.

Assumptions:

Students will be familiar with the General Reading text regarding weather.

Students will be familiar with the order of the days of the week.

Anticipated Problems and Solutions:

Problem: - RSVP – Rhythm, Speed, Volume and Pitch.

Solution: - The rate of speech on the recording will be slower than normal radio presenters.  A rate of 0.8 on media player is usually sufficient.

Problem: - Initially overwhelmed by information.

Solution: - Reassure the students that the recording will be played several times.

Problem: - Pronunciation of Sunny vs Sunday.

Solution: - One on one practice with the problem students.

Presentation.

Duration: 10 minutes

Activity.

Introduce the new vocabulary: Sunny, Fine, Cloudy, Raining and Typhoon.

Introduce the weather by eliciting a response “What is the weather like today?

Write a few of the different ways that this question is asked in English:

·         How’s the weather.

·         Is it a nice day outside?

·         What is the weather like where you are?

The weather report is on the radio after the news every hour.  Draw a picture of a radio on the board.

Show the Hong Kong weather web site as an authentic example of how to check the weather.

The website has a simple chart showing the day of the week and a symbol to represent the forecast.

Elicit a response from the class asking:

• what will the weather be like on a random sample of days.
• if they have seen the weather website.
• if their parents use the website.
• if they used the website to see what the weather will be like for an important event in the next week e.g. the school picnic or sports day.

Practice.

Duration: 20 minutes.

Distribute the worksheets with a personal greeting.

Referring to the worksheet, elicit a response regarding the weather on Sunday.

Elicit a response – “What will the weather be like on Monday?”

Elicit a response – what will the weather be like on Tuesday?  We don’t know!.  How can we find out?.

Lets listen to the weather report on the radio.

Production.

Duration: 30 minutes.

Reassure the students that the weather report will be played a few times and that there is no need to hurry. 

Start the recording that has 15 seconds of quiet time – during the 15 seconds, pretend to tune the picture of the radio to the news station.

After the first sentence, pause and elicit a response – can you hear?, is it too fast? – adjust if needed.

Replay the recording from the start and elicit a response from a random student – what will the weather be like on Thursday?, ask another student – “Is that correct?”

If there is an incorrect answer or it the answer is unknown – then elicit a response asking how they could find out.  Wait for an answer like – listen to the weather report and then use this prompt to replay the recording.  Replay the recording as needed or often as time permits.

Assessment and final discussion.

Elicit a response from the class for a self correction exercise.

See each student personally and elicit a response for a few of the entries and reward them with a stamp on their worksheet.

Follow up lesson:

What clothes do I wear today?

Use the weather information on the worksheets to prompt for a discussion about what clothes the students would wear according to the weather. 

Elicit a response to the class on what will you wear on Wednesday? 

Why would you wear that?

What is the weather like today.

Listen to the report to hear what will it be like for the week.

Listen for - Sunny, Fine, Cloudy, Raining and Typhoon 1.

  

Day	Temperature	Weather
Sunday	26° C	Cloudy
Monday	28° C
Tuesday
Wednesday
Thursday
Friday
Saturday

Weather report.

Script:

• Now here is the weather report for this week:

• Sunday, the temperature will be 26 degrees and it will be cloudy.
• On Monday, it will be 28 degrees and sunny.
• Tuesday, the temperature will be 25 degrees and it will be cloudy.
• Wednesday, the temperature will be 23 degrees and it will be rainy.
• Thursday, it will be rainy and the temperature will be 22 degrees.
• Friday, the temperature will be 26 degrees and there will be a typhoon level one.
• Saturday, the temperature will be 27 degrees and it will be fine.

==============
Instructor's comments:


Listening:
Very nice work.  Your choice of activities demonstrates your ability to handle the unique demands of teaching the skill of listening. The recording you´ve chosen, the activities you´ve created, and the problems you´ve anticipated show your experience with this level of student and your skill at creating appropriate listening lessons for them.  Your warm-up ensures that students will be prepared for the listening and your additional listening tasks are appropriate for them.  It was particularly nice to see that you include a follow-up activity that gives students the chance to reinforce new language in an interesting way.

Reading:
Well done!  Your selection of material and activities shows a sensitivity to your students´ levels and interests as well as an understanding of how to create an excellent reading lesson.  Your lesson flows well from introduction to gist questions to more detailed questions.  It was particularly nice to see your class ending with an activity getting the students to use their new language in a practical, personal way  that involves other skills.

20121009 Alan Jones and Radio Opinions

Alan Jones, famous opinionated broadcaster - just one more opinion. 

Way back in the olden days, around 1990, when radio was a relevant source of entertainment, there were a select few who made a living by telling people their opinion.  Now everyone can have their opinion seen, heard and even x-rayed on that brilliant 'interconnected series of tubes' we call the Internet.  

While stuck in peak-hour traffic between the hours of 4:30 to almost 9 o’clock we will no longer have rely on the radio for traffic reports, the news, or even listen to the mindless opine of a radio DJ because with the development of mobile-phone technology like LTE, 4G and amazingly inexplicable CDMA-x1 we can now use our wonderful iPhone (n+1) to get an Internet connection in our car.  So, as a result of this incessant march of technology, the last bastion of AM/FM radio the 'The Drive Time slot' is now under threat from the likes of facebook, youtube and Project Free TV.  

One of the loudest and most-opinionated of these broadcast personalities was Alan Jones who was able to earn a decent living for his producers by being so controversially stupid that listeners would tune in and wonder what he was going to stuff-up next.  Mercedes Benz has had enough of him over comments about the Prime Minister's dead dad and asked him to return the free car that was politely provided and has also refused to be associated with him ever again such was the level of embarrassment that can be caused by not knowing the difference between a fact, a logical fallacy and his arse.

There are of course many things worse than talk-back radio DJ’s who spout their biased and illogical opinion on commercial radio stations and are rewarded for their efforts by being paid a million dollars a year, and one such thing are a talk-back radio hosts who spout their biased and illogical opinion on community radio and are paid nothing.

References:
http://www.commercialradio.com.au/files/uploaded/file/Surveys%202012/Survey%201%202012/Brisbane%20Survey%201%202012%20Summary.pdf
http://www.theaustralian.com.au/news/alan-jones-loses-his-merc/story-e6frg6n6-1226489835280
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OCmbbk5WAJM&feature=relmfu
http://www.abc.net.au/news/2012-10-07/alan-jones-told-to-give-24250k-car-back/4299572

20120922 Teaching English as a Foreign Language. Bridge TEFL Module 3.

20120922  Teaching English as a Foreign Language.

TEFL Bridge.  The TEFL course which offers accredited training by peer-review.

“The BridgeTEFL TEFL & CELTA certifications are recognized both in the United States and in many countries." says certified TEFL Online & CELTA Graduate Don Guadagni.  So the course is perfect for teaching in the USA and many other non-specific and un-named countries.  If you have no idea where you want to go, then BridgeTEFL can get you there.

Bridge TEFL upholds the standards of the industry by a peer review by the The Accrediting Council on Continuing Education, ACCET, who expresses its sincere appreciation to all volunteers who serve as evaluators.  ACCET was founded in 1974 for the purpose of improving continuing education and training and has been officially recognized by the U.S. Department of Education since 1978 as a "reliable authority" as to the quality of education and training provided by the institutions we accredit.  Being recognized by the Department of Education is apparently just as good as actually being a part of the Department of Education.

Here is an example of the standard of work that can be expected and accepted according to the rigorous marking scheme of the peer-reviewed and accredited BridgeTEFL.  It is unacceptable to use first-person when writing at the tertiary level at most respectable universities but at BridgeTEFL, they take a more modern and relaxed approach than an established and accredited university by allowing the use of first-person as the subject.  After, all this course is about you, the teacher.  The curriculum advisers were told to prepare teachers work in far-away exotic countries and the accountants were given the same instructions regarding your course fee.

Module 3. 

1. Take a look at the list of items below. Decide which system these relate to: lexis, phonology, grammar or function.

I went to London; I´ve been to London.

Grammar

Lend me $5. Could you possibly lend me $5?

Function

library; bookstore

Lexis

foot; foots

Grammar

I'd rather not; No way!

Function

hit; heat

Phonology

photograph; photographer

Lexis

should; must

Lexis

2. Imagine that you work in a language school. You have just received a new student from Korea who wants to study English prior to entering a university in the U.S. The student takes the placement test, which is all grammar and vocabulary and mostly multiple choice. She scores quite high; however, she does not speak very well and has difficulty understanding even the

simplest spoken language. What balance of the four skills and the four systems would you recommend for her study program? For example, would you focus on reading and writing or utilize her strengths in grammar to introduce topics, but make the exercises mostly listening and speaking? Would you focus on function, pronunciation, productive skills because the test was multiple choice and not a fair assessment of her success in a university with writing papers and listening to lectures?Explain what an appropriate balance would be. How did you reach that recommendation?

I would a create a study program where the student listens to recordings and then answers comprehension questions.  All instructions would be given in writing to take advantage of her reading skills. 

There would be no transcript of the recording – the student must listen to the recording.  I would choose a skill level that accounts for student’s difficulty in understanding the spoken language.  (Can we assume that there are no other factors such as a hearing impairment?) The test answers would start as multiple choice answers and other open answer questions that require a short written response progressing into spoken presentation answers as the student develops.

I would focus on function because the skills will be needed to participate in the course and also when she starts university.  The recordings would be examples of asking questions in a classroom and how to elicit a response from a teacher.  Within the teaching of function there would be built-in components of grammar, phonics and lexis that would develop her productive skills.

As her receptive skills improve, the focus would be shifted from developing her listening skills to a fuller, more rounded course where all the receptive and productive skills are further developed in harmony with each other – so that the student is equal in her abilities in each component of the language .

I believe an appropriate balance of receptive versus productive skills would be 80% receptive in the form of listening and 20% productive in the form of written and spoken answers.

My recommendation is based on information in the text – it states that the student has passed a multiple choice question test on vocabulary and grammar.  It seems that the student has developed the reading and writing components of the language well but has not developed the listen and speaking components equally.  The text also states that the student  ”does not speak very well and has difficulty understanding even the simplest spoken language”  and as a result the recommended course of action would be to develop her listening and speaking skills.

Teachers comments

Your choice to utilize reading as a segue to promote an intensive listening and speaking focus shows an astute grasp of integrating and balancing the skills based on individual student needs.    Also, your ability to match the items listed in the question with the appropriate language system shows an excellent grasp of the systems concept.

The History and Spelling of English

Describe how your knowledge of the history of the English language will help you explain things to your students in an EFL class. Give specific examples.

As a Native English Teacher working in China I have had times when I have had to explain that the English language is made up from other languages.  The explanation is usually centered around the terrifying number of wars that Europeans were so good at starting but really needed some help in learning how to stop.  Knowing that a good portion of English is from Latin helps to explain the strange names the English give to appliances as compared to the stark descriptions given to mechanical devices in China.  As an example, in English we have the word television derived from the Latin words “far” and “see” which basically describes the machine as the thing that lets you see what is far away.  The Chinese word for television is Din Shi – or “electrical job” or the thing that uses electricity and to make one is a big job. 

The Chinese students have an English text where a character in the book goes to France.  While there, the character meets a French man named Monsieur Bas – I had to explain to the Chinese students that this is not an English title or name and that most of the letters in French are not pronounced.  The correct pronunciation is “Monsieur Bah”.  I think that it is unfair to introduce a difficult French name to young children that are already trying to learn English.

What differences in student approach to English do you anticipate when working with students who speak a Latin or Germanic language versus students who speak Japanese, Chinese or Arabic?

As a Native English Teacher working in China I have had the experience of teaching the words “athletic” to Chinese children only to have the lesson taken up with explaining how to make the “th” sound.  The problem is compounded when teaching this to a young child who may not have the fine motor skills to form the correct sounds. 

Describe strategies you will use in class to help you with your own spelling, if it´s a problem, like bringing a dictionary to class or writing down troublesome vocabulary in your lesson plan.

I overcome spelling problems by having a dictionary and noting troublesome words in the lesson plan – also as discussed  – eliciting a response from the students can be helpful.

Teachers comments

Your answer shows that you understand the importance of having a working knowledge of the history of English, an awareness of your students´ linguistic backgrounds, and a strategy for dealing with your own spelling weaknesses.  However, more specific examples of how these issues might play out in the classroom would strengthen your response.  Also, when discussing the differences between students of differing linguistic backgrounds, don´t forget that Arabic and Asian students also have a completely different alphabet.

Overall mark

60/70

References:

http://www.bridgetefl.com/index.php

http://www.accet.org/accreditation

http://www.bridgetefl.com/accet-accrediting.php

20120828 Teaching English as a Foreign Language to Early Childhood.

20120828 Teaching English as a Foreign Language in Early Childhood. ( ... is best done by professionals who are competent in the psychology of early language development.)

The very idea of an online teaching course is flawed and contradictory.  In practice, doubly so.  There are logical-reasoning errors that make circular arguments against itself.  Having said that, I have done this:

Teaching a Gym Class to Pre-school

Completing the TEFL, also known as Teaching English as a Foreign Language, course has proven an interesting exercise in building personal confidence but a poor investment in professional development.  One of my previous blog entries shows a letter from an employer stating that I am "too old" to be considered for a teaching job.  So, in an effort to re-balance the universe; post-rationalise my decision; and force a self-fulfilling-prophecy immortalised in the  words of Jack Black from his role as Dewey Finn pretending to be Ned Schneebly - "Those who cannot do; teach. And those who cannot teach, teach gym".  


Lesson One from Bridge TEFL.
TTT. Teacher Talking Time


TTT stands for Teacher Talking Time.  TTT can be a problem in a class for foreign-language students for a number of reasons.

1) - A teacher may feel that the natural silence that occurs between asking a question and receiving and answer may be "too long".  This time of silence is subjective and can vary between teachers and as a result the teacher may start talking again in an effort to elicit a response to fill an "awkward silence".  The act of asking another question will interrupt the student’s line of thought and delay the answer even further.  A teacher should allow time for a student time to understand the question and formulate an answer before prompting for a reply.

2) - The student's time is valuable.  A language class should give the student time to learn, practice and allow time to recall the information needed to create a positive experience and would like to see some return on their investment.  A student may also be a customer and therefore, customer perception regarding value for money needs to be considered.  A student, a customer, will make a subjective internal decision on the value of a language course based on their experience in the classroom and may frankly assume that a more economical way of listening to an hour of genuine English speaking may be accomplished by simply listening to the radio.

A Native English Teacher working in a Chinese school must consider several factors when the student is thinking of an answer.  One strategy is to put the student at ease by asking them to answer the question in their own language. 
This demonstrates to the teacher that the student can understand the question, and has an answer, but is searching for the right English words.  



How to avoid excessive TTT.

1) Be patient.  Allow the student to think quietly.  Students need to feel that their teacher is patient and their learning is important and we can use the class time efficiently to listen to their answer (Marsh, C. 2008).

2) Overcome the social stereotype that every occasion needs a backing sound.  Students learn better when they recall - it is recall that makes a memory stay (Karpicke et al. 2011).

I plan to use student centered activities such as English word games like Bingo and Hangman. The use of open questions such as "What have you done today?" and "What do like to do?" will be encouraged where students can answer and demonstrate their progress.

References:

Marsh, Colin. Becoming a Teacher. Pearson Education Australia 2008.

Karpicke, J. Practicing Memory Recall Boosts Science Learning. cited 2011.
http://neurosciencenews.com/practicing-memory-recall-boosts-science-learning/

Bridge TEFL
http://www.bridgetefl.com/

White, Mike.  School of Rock. Paramount Pictures 2003.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0332379/

20111116 The Occupy Brisbane Movement.

The Occupy Brisbane Movement.

A few months ago a small band of insignificant protestors gathered in Wall Street New York to make their voices heard regarding their perceptions of the 'greed of the corporate world' in America.

Like so many ideas that come from the United States of America it had at least two attributes: it was appealing and it was stupid.

Instantly and all around the world, at least two more people behaved in such a manner as to suggest that this was regarded as a fairly good way to take advantage of the rebellious idea that it was now ok to camp in a public place. And so, the daring few carried their tents into Post Office Square and made a stand for what they truly believed to be true. They were determined, they were resourceful, they had no idea what they wanted nor how to get it but that was not the purpose. Their purpose was to get some attention and pretend to be just like their American idols.

The basic idea of a protest is fairly simple: the protestors make everybody else feel uncomfortable until everybody else makes the protestors feel comfortable. This tactic has been astonishingly successful, and has proven to be necessary for the survival of the species, among those younger members of our society who have yet to develop their ability to speak, walk, or use civilised and customary systems of personal hygiene.

From the outset, the Occupy Movement has either deliberately or ignorantly refused to be part of the very system of change that is needed to meet their demands. If they only knew their demands.

The false hope that the Occupy Brisbane movement has created is sad to the point of being criminal. During the Occupation of Post Office Square, the news reported the industrial action at Qantas. One person actually asked the Occupy Brisbane movement to take action. This plea for help was a turning point in my perception because it occurred to me that some people in the fair city of Brisbane actually believed that a bunch of people sitting in a park had real power.

From these events, it is evident that there are people who believe that a public protest is the first order of action for change in a civilized society. The Queensland education system could not be so incompetent that it has utterly failed to tell students how the political system works. That is not the case. The Queensland Curriculum includes lessons at the year 9 level:

• Contact between cultures has produced movements to improve democratic participation and citizenship rights for specific groups

e.g. government policy and legislation to increase opportunities for participation in electoral and government

processes for women, Indigenous people and young people.

So, the question remains on why these people continue to follow a leaderless and illegitimate political movement. Possibly, they either missed class that day or they do not have the equivalent of a year 9 education.

In an effort to guide some of the wayward followers, I asked them if they had writen to their local member about their concerns. Not one of them had done so. They had a feeling of helplessness and isolation and that their concern would be disregarded. I asked others if they had looked at any of the policies of the existing parties to see if their concerns were already being addressed. Again, nobody had taken the time, about 3 minutes of research on the Queensland Government website, to find out.  While chatting with the supporters on facebook, I came to a realisation that there really are people who need to be protected from themselves. These people are truly a danger to society. As a political movement, it is a sad dismal failure. As a joke, the Occupy Brisbane Movement is an elaborate social success that went severely bung.

References:

http://www.qsa.qld.edu.au/downloads/early_middle/qcar_el_sose_yr9.pdf

http://www.occupybrisbane.org/

http://www.occupybrisbane.com/

http://occupywallst.org/

1102111230 Teaching English as a Foreign Language is for young people.

1102111230 Teaching English as a Foreign Language.


I never honestly considered that an on-line course to be an English teacher would be highly regarded by the teaching profession. A four-year degree course which includes the psychology of learning, effective formative assessment and a one-year practice in the classroom does not favorably compare to mucking about for 120 hours on the internet. Even though I managed to do well and was awarded good marks for my lesson plans, the teacher's comments never mentioned anything specific about my work: it was like they were cut-and-paste from a spam generator. The "print-it-yourself" on-line certificate does not carry any authority and there is something hollow and artificial about it. It lacks an essential ingredient. Like carob. Having said that, the only people who consider the qualifications from Bridge TEFL seriously are, oddly enough, the people at Bridge TEFL. The final part of the course is job placement with their agency. I received this reply:

Dear David,

Thank you for considering BridgeTEFLJobs for placement in South Korea. As a warning, placements are extremely difficult to secure in South Korea when the applicant is nearing the age of 50. We apologize for this difficulty. This is not a policy of BridgeTEFL, but of the employing agencies in South Korea. Each school has its own guideline for hiring teachers and currently most teachers being hired are from 22 to 40 years of age. If you are outside of this age group, it might take longer to find a school. Being that the retirement age in Asia is presently 50~55 yrs, it is highly unlikely that anyone nearing or past 50~55 yrs will obtain a decent job offer.

In light of this information, you may want to consider teaching in other areas, such as Latin America. If that sounds appealing, we strongly suggest enrolling in a TEFL Certification course in-country for numerous reasons:

* Allows time to acclimate to the culture
* Provides an opportunity to look for housing
* Usually includes free language lessons
* Encourages networking (with potential employers and classmates)
* Greatly improves your chances of being hired

Please visit http://www.bridgetefl.com/tefl-courses-abroad.php for a map with locations where we are currently offering such courses.

Please let me know if you have any questions or if you would like to continue with your placement in South Korea in spite of the aforementioned difficulties.

Regards,

Matt Clark

BridgeTEFL Jobs Advisor, BridgeTEFL
915 S. Colorado Blvd.
Denver, CO 80246
(303) 785-8861 (direct)
1-888-827-4757 (Toll-free USA & Canada)
0-800-028-8051 (Toll-free UK)
www.BridgeTEFLJobs.com

_______________

Dear Mark,

Thank you for your prompt reply.

I understand that this is not a policy of Bridge TEFL or your personal feelings, because age discrimination is illegal in the USA, Canada, England, France, Australia, New Zealand, most of Europe, some of the more interesting parts of Asia, anywhere East of the Urals, the Baltic States and the Antarctic Territories.

I sincerely hope that you live long enough to experience this yourself.

David Nightingale.
TEFL Graduate

1012082230 The Automatic War. Chapter One.

The news about North Korean artillery made me think of this:

"At My Command"

John lay in his allocated firing position, watching his arcs as his sergeant had ordered. There was no movement, there never was, there were no troops in the minefield that lay between the North and the South, there never was. He just lay there and peered into the blackness trying to see the military targets meticulously described in routine orders. After a while he tired of it and took out a letter from home that he had been waiting for a chance to read. At the same time, miles away, John’s small movement was detected by an enemy automated sentry using Doppler shift radar coupled to a thermal imaging device. The machine added an entry to its database of known enemy locations. This particular automatic sentry had noted the locations of 75 soldiers in the last hour. The night was quiet. There was no breeze. The air was cold. John attached a red coloured filter on his torch in the mistaken belief it would not been seen easily by the enemy. It was John's 16th mistake that he had made during his 2-hour guard duty, but he was aware of only 3 and disregarded those as petty. Although the light from his torch barely provided enough light for him to see, it showed up as a brilliant white point in the night-vision equipment of the automatic enemy sentry. The sentry controller was 25km away, out of artillery range and safe inside a hardened concrete shelter. His name was Jon and he honourably, and according to his orders, fulfilled his duty and remotely aimed the Chinese made Cz20mm cannon at the target. To Jon it was a routine task: allocate the new target to gun number 47. The image of John was clear, he could be seen fumbling with his torch in the dim red light. Jon watched the screen and noted the location of the target, the range, rounds remaining and the gun’s state of weapon readiness. Then, out of curiosity, he also looked at the barrel and cordite temperatures. He regarded another control with interest: AMC & Automatic. AMC stands for "At My Command", this setting gives the operator control over when to fire the gun. It is the trigger. When using the AMC setting, the decision to fire will be made by the operator, a person, a live human with feelings, compassion and maybe a family. The operator will make that decision based on his or her training, an assessment of the tactical situation or, a direct order from a higher ranking officer. When the gun is set to AMC it will report as "Ready" instead of firing. When the gun is set to "Auto" it will fire on the identified target without delay. The manufacturers of this weapon system won the lucrative defence contract by persuasive use of the words 'without delay'.

John, the identified target, took out the letter from his girlfriend back home. He was looking forward to reading about home; that far-away place where he could kiss his girlfriend, drive his blue Chevrolet convertible and stroll along Main Street freely without the constant nagging fear of stepping on something explosive. The letter read "Dear John, I have been lonely since you left and I have fallen in love with Jack. You'd like him, he has a red Dodge pick-up truck.” John had received a "Dear John" letter.

A soldier in a war-zone needs to keep control of impulsive behaviour because anything done on the battlefield can get a soldier killed; including doing nothing. On the frontline border in a region where an unknown number of nuclear warheads are always ready, and an even bigger unknown number of troops are waiting for a half-decent excuse to reunify the south, John started a tantrum that would last for both the rest of his life and another 14.5 seconds.

John’s immature-anger welled up, the misdirected blame scrambled his thoughts, a mere 20 years of life experience was not enough to give him perspective and presence of mind he needed to appreciate his role in the complex geopolitical topography of the worlds worst place to make sudden loud noises. He tried to make some sense of it all and verbalised in his preferred native expressions which used smaller words with their own distinct but similar sounding meanings. John cursed.

Now, he mistakenly thought to himself, he was going to personally end this war. He aimed his M205 assault rifle expertly and exactly as he had been taught during years of training. He held it firmly to reduce recoil and focused on the rear sight; it was black, he could not see it; he focused on the foresight, it was black, he could not see it either; he focused on the target, it was huge and black, he could not miss it. Then with purpose and intent he deliberately squeezed the trigger and fired twenty accurate well-aimed shots blindly into an area target he identified as the entire northern hemisphere.

The sound a rifle makes when fired may be compared to the sound of thunder, however, small arms do not sound like thunder. Small arms make a vicious and irritating sound like the barking of an angry little dog, only much louder. It is the big calibre weapons that have the volume and gas momentum to reverberate against the earth and rumble the ground to make the sound of thunder. The sound and muzzle blast from field artillery can lift the dust from the ground and push over fully grown men, much to their surprise and others' amusement. The sound of a rifle firing is a sharp sudden noise accompanied by a force that is felt in the sensitive delicate paper-thin facial muscles. There is a tiny moment of unconsciousness after each round is fired while the soldier’s body absorbs the shock and recovers from the involuntary blink. It takes a few milliseconds to focus, assess the fall of shot and correct any aiming errors. After careful observation and accurate corrections the next round is squeezed off. John had no need to correct for aiming errors, his target was the one half of the war, the enemy half, so everywhere north of his allocated firing position was just as good a target as anywhere else. John’s delicate facial muscles absorbed the recoil of the rifle while the force of the sound barged into his ears and pushed his eardrums as far back as they would go, and then rattled them. He fired at nothing and everything, cursing the enemy, the war and his tiny futile role in it.

John's first round left the barrel of his rifle at a speed of 853 meters per second, a number that John had learned and remembered during basic training because it was a vital piece of information that every soldier must know, just in case he was ever asked by an officer. The round then travelled about 720 metres in the first second: the round slows down considerably with air resistance. The sound of the first bullet was noted with interest by one of the enemy's many automated listening posts. Its sensitive microphones recorded the "crack" of the sonic boom made by the bullet as it travelled along its arc and then listened for the "bang" of the rifle that fired it. The listening post sent the data to the command post where it was analysed and compiled then and compared to similar data from several other identical automated listening posts. A "circle of error" appeared on a map in the enemy’s command post. John was somewhere in that circle and every round that John fired made the circle smaller. The circle shrank smaller and smaller about three times every second until it became a point. This point indicated known troop locations. A stream of data was sent to gun 47. Several stepper motors in the aiming mechanism pointed the business end of the weapon at John. A 20mm full-metal jacket round was loaded into the chamber by an obedient solenoid.

At the enemy command post, on the control panel, a circuit switched on a particular resistive filament which warmed and then glowed with satisfaction as it illuminated the "Ready" light for gun 47.

As John's final tantrum continued, the sound of semi­automatic rifle alerted his section. Every soldier in the 1st of the 83rd of the 9th Mobile armoured light fighters sprang into action, to some it was a reaction to firing, others it a reaction to a conditioned response, others were just scared that the sergeant would yell at them. The men were well armed, well trained, motivated, fit and completely wrong. The orders stated that they must fire only when they see the enemy advancing. An alert radio operator sent a report to the brigade headquarters, "2 this is 2.2. Contact over". The short message spoke volumes, in its own shorthand way it said: "Calling Company Headquarters for the 1st of the 83rd of the 9th Mobile armored light fighters, this is platoon number 2, section 2, we are currently being attacked from the North, they are advancing on our location with armoured support". There is a lot of implied information in an army message.

In the enemy command post, the field officers saw the 1st of the 83rd of the 9th Mobile armored light fighters suddenly moving forward. This was honestly interpreted as an assault. The evidence was clearly before them. There was only one explanation: the south had started its invasion. In his own language, a Northern signaller sent a similar volume of information to his company headquarters. The sentry controller watched with great concern as automatic sentry guns numbered 14 to 39 detected forward movement and displayed ready lights, there was movement along the front, all advancing. The computer controlled sentry made a quick calculation of the predicted troop movement and alerted the officers by sounding a dignified beep. This particular beep had a distinct sound that, when interpreted correctly, told the sentry controller that at the current speed of movement, the soldiers of platoon number 2 would cross the perimeter in less than three minutes. The sentry controller knew the drill, he knew the procedure, he knew the orders. It is clearly stated that in the event of an imminent invasion, all guns must be set to fire automatically. Jon obeyed the order. He switched the big calibre weapons from AMC to automatic. Jon listened to the sound of little angry dogs barking at the thunder.

Gun 47 received the coded signal to fire an accurate three round burst at a point target. A capacitor charged, a transistor closed a circuit and sent 50 volt shock into the percussion cap of the chambered 20mm round. Following the laws of physics and chemistry, PV=nrT, the propellant gasses ignited, heated and rapidly expanded. The hot gas tried to expand inside the tiny cartridge as its volume increased to more than ten-thousand times of that of its solid state. The hot gas built up 52,000 pounds of bore pressure and impinged on the base of the projectile. Suddenly, the gas pressure overcame the initial resistance and accelerated the bullet along the barrel to a speed of 990 metres per second. The 20mm bullet burst from its confinement out of the barrel as if in celebration of its new-found freedom with a flash of light and an intense square-wave of sound. The gun recoiled in surprise as it released 4.5 litres of red-hot gas while the sound of reverberating thunder expanded into the night air. The massive 480 gram projectile, its gas expended, its cartridge case ejected, followed its graceful arc for 2,325 meters before hitting its allocated target just above the centre of the seen mass and slightly below its sensitive delicate paper-thin facial muscles. The second round passed through John’s Kevlar armour without any significant loss of momentum while the third round sped past his inert body, through a cloud of fine red mist and whiff of steam. In the next 3.14159 seconds, the mechanical automated sentry delicately adjusted its aim with ballet-like precision and repeated this procedure another 74 times with similar results. John's last round fell harmlessly into the Northern countryside about five meters from the enemy listening post.

Bibliography:

http://www.eurasiareview.com/analysis/10121-strategic-instability-in-korea

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/12/08/AR2010120800838.html?hpid=topnews